Ten Improved Versions of the ‘Entourage’ Finale

This year saw the popular HBO series come to an end after almost eight years on the air. It was never the most complex or thought provoking of television entertainment, focusing on the ups and downs of Hollywood’s next would-be star and his motley crew of mates and hangers-on. You wouldn’t think such a basic concept would need much thought and imagination in order to produce a satisfactory conclusion to the scattered story elements. Instead they managed to deliver one of the most pointless, toothless, sappy finales in television history.

It’s a too late to do anything at this point, but here’s a list of ways the ending would’ve been more entertaining. And would make more sense. And not suck.

Version #1: Everyone gets sued for sexual harassment.

Every single one of the five main characters has been accused of inappropriate conduct at some point, but few women have acted upon it. In the series finale, the suppressed resentment they have been feeling comes to the surface and they’re forced to act on it and take them to court. The final episode sees them all being summoned to answer for their crimes.

Version #2: In a surprise twist, Turtle turns out to be an asshole.

One of the most idiotic moments in the final episodes was Turtle spending years trying to turn is life around, studying and working, only for him to chance into millions of dollars through sheer luck thus negating his entire character arc up until that point. The only other facet of Turtle’s personality is that he’s content mooching off everyone else for his expensive lifestyle. Now Turtle is self-sufficient, we could have a left turn on the ending when he has the chance to bail everyone else out of trouble, but doesn’t because he’s a selfish prick.

Version #3: ‘Medellin’ becomes a cult smash.

Demonstrating the unpredictable nature of the film industry and the camp value of terrible films, ‘Medellin’ becomes a cult midnight screener complete with cosplay, call-outs and conventions. Vincent makes his living from his new merchandising empire based on collectable Pablo Plushes.

Version #4: Vince wins an Oscar!

It’s more likely then half the crap that happened in the finale.

Version #5: They find a magic movie ticket that lets them go into their movies!

It’s more likely then half the crap that happened in the finale.

Version #6: Lloyd snaps.

After having his self esteem and confidence quashed by Ari, one racist, homophobic remark pushes him over the edge and the PA snaps, shooting Ari and rampaging through the agency office taking out his disgust on the industry with a semi-automatic.

Version #7: They travel to an alternate dimension.

The boys find themselves transported to a parallel timeline where Johnny Drama was launched into untouchable stardom following the success of ‘Viking Quest’. Since then he’s become the greatest star Hollywood has ever known living a life of hedonistic excess, complete with Vince working as his butler.

Version #8: It’s all in Vince’s head.

Vincent Chase is a sick man. In the closing moments we find that he’s spent the past eight years in an institution trapped in a deluded fantasy world. Seeing his friends and family achieving success and fame whilst his attempts to coast through life on his looks let to a breakdown and saw him construct a world in his mind where they all work in demeaning positions serving his needs. His absent father is recreated as the agent who serves to support him at every turn.

Version #9: The plane crashes.

All the perfect happy endings they all stumble upon in the final twenty minutes was really just a set-up for sudden shock ending when the plane they’re traveling in crashes and they all die.

Version #10: The act like the characters we were familiar with.

Who the hell were those people in the final episode? They weren’t acting in character at all. Let’s try it again with them acting like themselves.